That's Life: The Power of Thank You
That's Life: The Power of Thank You
I just returned from a two and a half week safari in the Lowveldt of Zimbabwe. Every time I visit Africa, I return home with a bit of sadness in my heart. Part of it, because I’m not ready to go home yet, and because I’m leaving my friends behind. The other part of me is sad for the people I did leave behind. The country is in ruins, and the people there, though hearty and resilient, are in serious peril.
Times are not good in Zimbabwe.
But they all have one common thread, and that is they believe that things will get better. Things will get better, and things could always be worse. It got me to thinking about how grateful I am for things I have in my life, and about the things we take for granted.
Gratitude is a fundamental principle that I often forget to practice. My grandmother once said, “Noticing all that you have to be grateful for, and regularly writing thank-you notes, are cornerstones of spirituality.”
Experience this for yourself. Stop right now and make two lists. On one, name the five people who have caused you the most grief in business in the past year. On the second, name the five persons who have brought you the greatest benefits.
Address 10 envelopes, one for each of the names on your two lists. Every week for the next 10 weeks, write a thank you note to one of these 10 people and send it.
Naturally, it will be relatively easy to say what you are thankful for when you write the five people who have brought you clear benefits. If you only do this much, you will experience more positive moods and you will notice more of the pleasant aspects of doing business. As a result, it will be more pleasant for others to do business with you, and they will tend to do more of just that.
But don't stop there. When you write letters of gratitude to the five people who have brought you grief, I predict you will uncover things that will open the door to new opportunities for success. While you may choose not to send the letters to the folks who have caused you grief, by mining the painful experiences for the lessons at their core you will be radically altering the way these experiences influence your business.
How are you supposed to find something to be thankful for when a relationship has been troubled, perhaps even damaging to your bottom line? I propose that you cannot afford to have a loss you do not learn from, and once you have mined the lessons from a bad situation, you clearly have something for which to be grateful.
This is not mere verbal sleight of hand. It is a practice of mental and emotional hygiene that is essential for maintaining a generative approach to the ups and downs of being in business. This action requires that you be rigorously honest. It asks you to look deep into your heart and into your history to discover what your most difficult relationships or transactions have taught you. Then it asks that you graciously acknowledge, if only to yourself, the people who have been party to that learning.
It may be that you choose not to send the second set of notes. Perhaps you choose not to be in relationship with one of these people for very good reasons. This is not about sacrificing your dignity or compromising your values; it's about harvesting the learning from the bitter fruits as well as the sweet.
As we move into the fourth quarter of the year, I have many things to be grateful for. If you get a note from me, don’t question which of the two piles your name was in. I appreciate you just the same!
